Like the comic, I still think of Epiphany as January 6. And yes, to me, the words “Ascension” and “Thursday” go together. (Pretty funny, given that not only was I born after Vatican II, but I didn’t even come into the Church until 1996!)
I was just marveling earlier today that I perhaps am a Church conservative–I just picked up my copy of the pope’s latest apostolic exhortation, and was startled that it had the title The Word of God with the subtitle Verbum Domini. I’d thought of it solely by its Latin title; the fact that it had an English name hadn’t really occurred to me. Maybe this shows that I’m not “in the heart of the Church,” neither left nor right of the Church’s teachings? Something to pray about, anyway.