I’m reading books to my older girls when my 16 month old starts opening and closing her chubby hands (the sign for “milk”; lest you be too impressed, she knows about four signs: “book,” “more,” “milk,” and “please,” all the important things in life). “Maa! Maa!” (her word for milk) she says emphatically, hands still … Read more
I have crossed over to the other side. I’m not sure when it happened, but something fundamental about my circumstances has changed. I am an old person now. I first realized it a few years ago when I was flipping through a women’s magazine and an ad caught my eye. It was the kind of … Read more
My mother did not, to my knowledge, abort any of her children. I do, however, distinctly recall a miscarriage she suffered when I was twelve years old, which caused her great emotional and physical pain. I understood, from my adolescent perspective, that what was lost was somehow precious to her. As another of her children, … Read more
During my pregnancy with my first child, I belonged to an interdenominational Bible study that was filled mostly with medical students who planned on doing mission work. Waddling in to the room, I remember feeling like a spiritual slacker surrounded by all these selfless MDs-to-be, discussing their plans to spread the Good News while offering … Read more
Over the past six years, people — particularly other moms — have asked me how I’ve handled being a military mom. Most of the time, I just chuckle. I don’t feel like I’ve handled it at all. Basically, I’ve let our Blessed Mother handle it for me, and I merely go along for the ride. … Read more
“So what do you do?” I’m asked over drinks at a recent party. Â I mentally flip through a list of possible responses. I hesitate, considering my interrogator. I think I remember someone mentioning he works as a neurosurgeon. Â He performs brain surgery. I wipe little bottoms. Â So here’s my quandary: Do I … Read more
I grew up with a dad who prays the Liturgy of the Hours, and as a result, the Church’s daily pockets of prayer have always held a special attraction for me. Perhaps when I am an older woman, I will live the kind of life conducive to praying the Divine Office, but for now, my … Read more
In 2003, I discovered quite unexpectedly that I was pregnant. I was in the middle of my course work for my Ph.D., so we weren’t yet “trying” to get pregnant, but it has a way of happening in a marriage. We were overjoyed to discover the positive pregnancy test — but things quickly went wrong … Read more
There is a line in Scripture that has always infuriated me. It’s Timothy 2:15, and for years I could not read it without wanting to hurl my Bible at the wall. “The woman,” writes St. Paul, “will be saved by childbearing, if only she continue with faith, love and holiness.” Its baptized misogyny was insulting enough … Read more
I keep an orderly kitchen — spices fresh and organized; cereal safely resealed into sorted Tupperware containers; a fitted lid for every pot, pan and roaster. I have been heard to screech, “Who loaded the dishwasher without rinsing the dishes?” Scissors, tape, and push pins all have a right place, and the telephone book remains … Read more
Catholic women who find themselves unexpectedly pregnant stand to benefit from others’ experience. This was the thought that motivated me to post some readers’ emails on my blog addressing the struggle to remain open to life in marriage and the difficulty of accepting an unexpected pregnancy. “Let’s encourage one another,” I wrote on the blog. … Read more
By Friday night, I am exhausted. Sometimes, too drained to do anything else, I play a game listing the people who irritated me the most that week. It’s not charitable: It’s my Friday Night Hit List. My husband’s former girlfriend. This woman occasionally surfaces in my life, like a toxic oil slick. She suddenly appeared … Read more
First, I want the reader’s sympathy. Before I wrote this column, I ploughed through the jargon-ridden and statistics-laden pages of a recent study on “Trends and Determinants of Fertility Rates in OECD Countries: The Role of Public Policy.” Once upon a time I read such things with something strangely approaching pleasure. Now they make my … Read more